family

Hello, Caitlyn! The world has been waiting for you!

jenner5

Yes, the world has been waiting for Caitlyn to be born, even though maybe they didn’t know. The world needed her in order to understand, learn tolerance and develop a new attitude. Her life story is an example for us: you might look like you have it all, but inside your not happy. It’s like being  and acting like somebody else all your life. At one point or another in life we all do that. Some all their life, some only for few days, but we do that. And we do that because we are  afraid of how society will judge us. So I have to say that Caitlyn did us all a favor, no matter if we wanna change our genre or change our lifestyle. We must put our happiness first and start not caring about what people say. It will make us happy. And our happiness will make our loved ones happy. And then it will be a happier world.

Although we saw the male version of Caitlyn, Bruce Jenner for many years in a reality show, we didn’t know his struggle. I can only imagine how hard it was for him to put his happiness aside for his family. And eventually he realized that this sacrifice is not making them happy because he was not happy. He was angry. And now they know why.  This person looked like he had it all. Family, success, money, houses love, everything that a human being could ask for. He won the gold medal for the Olympics. He achieved this all with a price, losing his own identity. Would he have this all if he was Caitlyn from the beginning? I guess will never know.

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Bruce Jenner, Olympic Decathlon Champion

Talking about Caitlyn’s (former Bruce) family I can only admire how that family is passing through this hard period of time. It is not an easy job to be in the spot light and to reveal all your emotions. Maybe they got used to it in so many years, but this is not the point. Seeing how they care for each other and how they supported Bruce on his path to happiness is wonderful.

Kris-Jenner

Kardashians and Jenners

I can only hope for good things coming from this public change. Hope the lesson that was learned and the love that was shared. No matter what. Idealistic,but worth dreaming. Caitlyn is a happier person now, why wouldn’t you be happier?

Photo Sources: mashable.com, au.eurosport.com, mirror.co.uk

by Roxana Miron

8 Way to mess with your child’s emotions and mind.

As a young 20 something woman I found out that I have some problems not necessary with me, but with my parents. It’s hard for me to listen to them now that I am an adult even if I used to kind of be besties with my mom. I spoke with several psychologist about how I “lost” my understanding of my parents but as the problem got deeper than my budget, I had to figure ways to manage my anger by myself. I got some hobbies and begun to read a lot more to calm myself. By reading so much I found that my problem it’s not actually a problem but more of a  repercussion of my parents behavior in my youth. One of the best examples I can give is this awesome article I found on huffingtonpost. com written by a veteran psychologist, Sherrie Campbell.

Our children are the lights of our lives. We all start off as parents envisioning nothing but success, love and happiness for them. However, these dreams often do not manifest because they are not getting the important things they need to become disciplined, mature and motivated adults. The following are eight parenting f*ck-ups that will guarantee your child will suffer from depression, anxiety, anger, tense family relationships, problems with friends, low self-esteem, a sense of entitlement and chronic emotional problems throughout his or her life.

1. Ignore or minimize your child’s feelings. If your child is expressing sadness, anger or fear and you mock them, humiliate them, ignore or tease them you minimize what they feel. You essentially tell them what they feel is wrong. When parents do this they withhold love from their child and miss opportunities to have open and vulnerable connections teaching them to bond and to know they are loved unconditionally.

2. Inconsistent rules. If you never talk about your expectations, you keep your child from knowing how to behave appropriately. Children live up or down to what you expect. Rules give them guidelines and boundaries to help them define who they are, good and bad. If you keep your child guessing and life is vague, they will begin to act out to find the boundaries themselves, which leads to low self-esteem and problem behavior.

3. Make your child your friend. Never share all your worries, concerns and relationship problems with your child or ask their advice. If you act helpless and defeated to your children they will never learn to respect you and will treat you as an equal or an inferior because you have used them for your own therapy. You must show your children you can stand up to problems, face your challenges and handle life through all the stress and come out on the other side. Be real, have your emotions, but do not burden your children.

4. Put down your child’s other parent. If you never show affection and love to your partner/spouse in front of your child, the child does not develop a barometer for what love is or what it looks like. If you are always putting your spouse down and rejecting him/her, threatening divorce, you create a chronic state of anxiety for your child. If you are already divorced and you remain cold, distant, bitter, angry and blaming of your ex-spouse, you are sending the subtle message to your child that your ex-spouse is the cause of the divorce and you need to be the preferred parent. This is parent alienation.

5. Punish independence and separation. When we punish our children for growing up, we make them feel guilty for having normal developmental needs and desires which often causes deep insecurity, rebellion, cutting and other forms of behaviors that indicate failure to be able to branch out and be themselves as independent people.

6. Treat your child as an extension of you. If, as a parent, you link your own image and self-worth to your child’s appearance, performance, behavior, grades and how many friends they have, you let them know they are loved not for who they are but for how well they perform and make you look good. This turns them into pleasers rather than doers, and they will always worry about being good enough.

7. Meddle in your child’s relationships. Directing every action your child takes in their relationships — from friends to teachers — inhibits their maturity. For example, if your child gets in trouble at school and you immediately rush to talk to the teacher to get them off the hook, or you are constantly telling your child how to be a friend, as your child grows he/she will never learn to navigate the sharper edges relationships bring on their own.

8. Over-protect. When we protect our children from every problem and emotion, it creates a sense of entitlement and inflated self-esteem that often crosses the line into narcissism. They expect life to be easier than it is. They want everything done for them no matter how they behave. They then become depressed and confused when they don’t get what they believe they deserve.

I am not going into personal details but I can say that most of these points apply to me and now everything makes sense. After a while, after I read the article I was even more angry with my parents. It seemed to unfair that they tried to control my life in a such way that when I took action they felt I betrayed them. And it seems so unfair I felt guilt because of their disappointment. The sad part it is that they didn’t even realize they were doing it because they were full of such good intentions and love that they forgot that I may be their child but I am not their clone.

Keep in mind that your child (or future one) it’s not your extension and not your clone! And what you might like and dream of it does not necessary apply to him/her also!

But if you, as a child, realize your parents mistakes, don’t tell them ’cause they can not do a thing about it now, but get professional help or at least try to understand as I did.

Maria Korodi here, see you around.

My beautiful woman

By PseudoNimeni
Yesterday, while I was wondering what should I write about or what video to share on the blog I crossed over this short video.

It’s and ad created for the “Beauty Inside” campaign. No, it’s not about some sexy woman in her thongs, it’s about parenthood.
It made me think about how we always rush to judge people without knowing their stories.

Enjoy it.

Despre aborigeni şi gardul anti-iepuri

The topic for tomorrow’s class is cultural norms and values in traditional communities and modern societies (Yes, I just made a combination between the course topic and the seminar topic. But when did we ever draw a clear line between these activities?)

Here’s some food for thought until then – an older blog post that the blogger recommended after I shared on Facebook an article from The Guardian about the heartbreaking modern eugenics allowed and practiced in nowadays Autralia (did I use some normative words in this sentence? Of course I did. To some extent, social scientists have the opportunity to form opinions based on information and to care&act as citizens).
Yours truly,
Dr. Whoifof

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Diversitatea e una dintre sursele nesecate de bucurie, fiindcă înseamnă (şi) tot ce e nou şi interesant pentru cineva. E ceea ce stă la baza succesului unei reviste celebre ca National Geographic (cu varianta autohtonă, asta). Diversitatea e în strânsă legătură cu una dintre cele mai mari calităţi umane – curiozitatea şi cu dorinţa şi nevoia de progres.

Fără diversitate am fi cu adevărat săraci şi trişti, lipsiţi de entuziasm şi de soluţii. Am fi la fel şi am face lucrurile într-un singur mod. Probabil mulţi ar muri devreme, răpuşi de plictiseală. Eu sigur.

De-asta mi-e greu să înţeleg imboldul prea des întâlnit la oameni de a vrea să-i stârpească pe cei diferiţi. În loc să învăţăm unii de la alţii şi să evoluăm, fără a ne omogeniza neapărat. Nu sunt de acord nici cu acele “diferenţe de opinii” născute în anumite societăţi umane…

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Are we humans, or are we dancers? Socialization 101.

By Diana Cristolţean

Leaving the philosophy of The Killers’ music aside for the moment, it is surprising to me how it gets more and more confusing over time to write a description of oneself, even for 3rd year Journalism students. We all reacted kind of disappointed when we heard that we need to introduce ourselves (again). Of course, since we love living dangerously we also pushed the deadline a bit. Then, we found ourselves struggling to choose the proper words to convey the uniqueness of each of us, over thinking and hyper analyzing, until frustrated, one mindlessly types “human being”, “creature” or “individual”. “I’m just a human being, after all, why such a big fuss?.”

Being human is being able to reason, having a set of values as guidelines and being capable of developing emotions. We shape a personality, a self-identity in the process of socialization. Thankfully, this does not refer to socializing on Facebook, since we’re all  sort of specialized in that and this post would be pointless.

The act of conforming ourselves to the society’s norms and values, of behaving accordingly, is called socialization and it can be done with the interference of some agents: persons, groups and institutions and last but not least, the school, the family, the media and the church or other significant groups. Socialization refers to learning rules of conduct and thought in order to live inside a given society and it’s a way of surviving. It’s also a form of passing some cultural habits and aspects, this being the reason why the content of socialization taught in different parts of the world differs, but not the way of teaching it. (take for example eating). Even more strikingly different are our experiences with some subcultures like ethnicity, religion, gender, etc.

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B-day – comment is free

by Dr. Whoifof

I have just survived my birthday. I’m celebrating everyday, anyway, so enjoying who I am and who I can become once more was a real treat 🙂

Beyond ‘me, me, me,’ this occasion also brings upon ‘people’ certain responsibilities and requirements to perform. Even though I threw a small b-day party – we fried tons of minciunele/csoroge and had a cultural feast with music from around the world – not all of my family attended. Mainly because it was a ‘peer’ party 🙂 So now I’m catching up and deep frying some minciunele (don’t know what these are? Google them up or let’s have another deep frying party together). In half an hour, I’ll visit my parents in law with these delights, to have a mini-minciunele-birthday-party.

Comment is free, dear students and friends, on the forces and dynamics of family and friends as social institutions in acknowledging a member on a special occasion (belonging? socialization?) and on the cultural practices around b-days 🙂 Do you think my in laws would have been offended if I didn’t deep fry some minciunele? 🙂 What do the books say about roles and performance?

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